


the salt-breeze (it burns my eyes)

by vagarius



Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: A3 Rarepairs Week 2020, Day 1: Adoration, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Porn with Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-13
Updated: 2020-07-13
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:26:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25245367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vagarius/pseuds/vagarius
Summary: Kazunari and Tasuku spend a weekend at the beach.
Relationships: Miyoshi Kazunari/Takatoo Tasuku
Comments: 18
Kudos: 68
Collections: A3! Rare Pairs Week 2020





	the salt-breeze (it burns my eyes)

**Author's Note:**

> or: i can't believe i just wrote horny kazu angst
> 
> HI WHY IS THIS MY SECOND LONGEST FIC TO DATE AHHHHHHHHHH
> 
> anyway. this is for a3 rarepairs week 2020 day 1: adoration! pls enjoy!!

Kazunari lightly pulls on Tasuku's forearm. "C'mon, let's go in the water!"

"Isn't it too cold?" Tasuku points out, otherwise showing no reaction to Kazunari's insistent tugging. Kazunari pouts at him, then stands closer than perhaps strictly necessary.

"I mean, I guess…" Kazunari trails off, tugging once more on Tasuku's arms. "But we can still put our feet in, right? What's the point of a beach trip if you don't touch the water at all?"

Tasuku rolls his eyes, but finally lets himself get pulled along by Kazunari toward the water. "Are you really asking me that?"

Kazunari giggles, then slides one of his hands down Tasuku's forearm, idly admiring the muscles along it. He stops at Tasuku's wrist and rubs his thumb over the protruding bone, his smile turning purposely lazy while his gaze melts into something molten and syrupy-sweet. Tasuku looks more or less indifferent when Kazunari blinks up at him, but his eyes remain locked onto him, even as their feet are suddenly submerged in the cold ocean water.

Kazunari jumps, unintentionally kicking up water droplets and sand with his toes. "Cold!" he yelps while hopping backward. His fingers tighten their grip around Tasuku's wrist.

"I told you," Tasuku says, but doesn't protest as Kazunari pulls them farther down the shore. "Try not to kick sand this time."

Kazunari makes no promises, once again jumping when his feet hit the water. _This is nice,_ he thinks, bumping into Tasuku's side. _I'll treasure it._

"It's fine, it's fine," Kazunari assures. "The sand will wash right off!"

Tasuku sighs, but continues to allow Kazunari pull him up and down the shore.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Kazunari absentmindedly notes, eyes temporarily drawn to the ocean water. The receding tide gives the illusion of an endless expanse, the blue-green stretch glistening under the late afternoon sun. Kazunari almost wishes he had his sketchbook, and maybe a couple paints – but that's not what he's here for.

Tasuku shrugs. "I guess," he says.

Kazunari laughs, poking Tasuku in the cheek with his free hand. "You would just say that, wouldn't you?"

Tasuku clicks his tongue, but lets Kazunari do as he pleases. "You're the artist here."

"And you're unromantic," Kazunari counters. "That's fine, though! It's just part of Takusu's charm."

Tasuku grimaces, then gently slaps Kazunari's hand away from his face. Kazunari simply laughs and continues to drag him down the shore.

Much too quickly, the sky turns from blue to pink to green. Kazunari's stomach unceremoniously growls when the first streaks of orange begin to smudge the sky, and Kazunari's cheeks heat with embarrassment as Tasuku raises an eyebrow at the sound. "Hungry?" Tasuku asks with a note of amusement in his voice, and Kazunari puffs out his cheeks before sheepishly nodding.

They spread out Kazunari's towel on the sand before sitting down. Kazunari tries not to look too eager as he pops open his bento, but Tasuku just raises his eyebrow again at Kazunari's forced hesitation. Kazunari pouts and bumps their shoulders together, but Tasuku, as expected, doesn't budge at all.

Kazunari digs his toes into the cooling sand, then presses his and Tasuku's shoulders together once more, letting the warmth from Tasuku's shoulder seep into his. He turns his head until his lips nearly brush again Tasuku's ear. "Thanks for coming with me," Kazunari murmurs. "Let's have lots of fun, okay?"

Tasuku only grunts in reply, but as Kazunari leans more of his weight against him, he doesn't pull away. "We can take pictures for a bit before heading back?" Kazunari suggests, voice back to its normal volume. "The ocean is too pretty not to!"

Tasuku rolls his eyes. "Finish your food first, Miyoshi."

"Is that a yes?" Kazunari exclaims.

"I said finish your food first, Miyoshi."

Kazunari shoots him a toothy grin, humming to himself as he does as he's told. After taking a few shots of the ocean and pulling a reluctant Tasuku into more pictures than intended, they finally make their way back to their tiny hotel room. Kazunari immediately sheds off his sweaty shirt, then hops over to his bag to pull out a smaller bag of toiletries.

"Mind if I wash up?" Kazunari asks, pointing his thumb toward the bathroom.

Tasuku hums in acknowledgment from where he's looking for a clean towel, flapping his hand vaguely in his direction.

Kazunari hops into the bathroom, then does his best to shake the exhaustion out of his bones. It's not hard to, when his body is practically buzzing with excitement. He quickly relieves himself before washing his hands and face, then wipes off the last bits of sand from his legs. He blinks a few times in the mirror before pulling out some lip balm from his bag and quickly swiping some on.

When Kazunari walks out of the bathroom, Tasuku is just finishing up wiping the sand from his own body. Kazunari cheerfully clings onto him as soon as he's done, and rubs his forehead against his bicep.

"Takusu," he chimes. "I'm bored."

Kazunari feels more than hears the way Tasuku sighs. "And what do you want me to do about it, Miyoshi?"

Kazunari hums. "I dunno," he replies, then props his chin on Tasuku's shoulder to look up at his face. "Play with me?"

Tasuku chokes on a laugh, and Kazunari immediately pulls away to pout at him. Tasuku just chuckles harder. "Really?" he says. "That's the angle you're going for?"

Kazunari lets out a sound not unlike a small bird, then sticks his tongue out in retaliation. "Not my fault you're hard to flirt to! Can't you make it easier and just go along with it?"

Tasuku doesn't respond, but he does swallow down the rest of his laughter, and Kazunari feels oddly relaxed as pushes himself into Tasuku's space once more. "Well?" Kazunari asks, daintily perching his arms over Tasuku's shoulders. He tilts his head with a grin. "Aren't you gonna kiss me?"

Tasuku huffs, but still places his hands on Kazunari's waist, and as Kazunari slowly tips his head backward, he sees Tasuku's eyes grow darker, flickering across the exposed skin of Kazunari's neck.

By the time Tasuku bends down to mouth at his neck instead of his lips, Kazunari already half-expects it, humming approvingly as Tasuku's tongue traces along his skin. What Kazunari doesn't expect is the gentle hold on his waist, nor the careful hand that moves to his hair, tenderly cradling his head as Tasuku's lips finally meet his.

Kazunari kisses back lazily, waiting for Tasuku to pick up the pace. With anyone else, the hand in his hair would already be tugging, the hand at his waist greedy and bruising. But Tasuku's fingers stay lax and still, even as the kiss deepens, tongue slipping into Kazunari's mouth with a delicate caution that has Kazunari both confused and whimpering.

Tasuku just barely pulls away, his breath puffing warmly against Kazunari's lips. Somewhere outside, a bird crows above the water.

Kazunari inhales, then grapples Tasuku closer.

The kiss he initiates is sloppy at best, more spit and teeth than anything else, but Kazunari keeps going, digging his nails into Tasuku's back and hoping he gets the hint.

Tasuku quickly takes control of the kiss until it resembles something a little less violent, with more lips and less teeth, but just as wet. Kazunari melts into it, but doesn't let up his harsh grip, even as Tasuku seemingly refuses to tighten his own.

The hand on Kazunari's waist slides sideways and upward, gliding along his stomach and then to his chest. _Finally,_ Kazunari thinks, moaning lightly as Tasuku swipes firmly at one of his nipples, pinching and circling it with his thumb. Kazunari insistently pushes his head against the hand in his hair, but Tasuku's grip never tightens, and Kazunari briefly wonders if Tasuku is dense or just not into it. _Or maybe…_

His thoughts are abruptly cut off by the hand on his chest quickly sliding back downwards, settling on the waistband of his shorts. Kazunari rocks onto his toes in attempt to move the hand lower, but Tasuku doesn't budge. "Takusu," Kazunari whines against his lips. "Don't tease me."

"You consider that teasing?" Tasuku mumbles back, but moves his hand anyway, gripping Kazunari firmly through his shorts. He strokes Kazunari over the fabric, and while it certainly feels _good_ , it isn't enough.

"Takusu," Kazunari whines again, pointedly pushing his hips into Tasuku's palm. "Didn't you want to fuck me? Don't tell me you changed your mind."

Tasuku clicks his tongue before pulling completely away, and the pang of guilt and disappointment in his chest make Kazunari's body run cold. But then Tasuku is pulling off his own shorts, revealing toned thighs and tan-lines, and Kazunari's blood starts simmering once more. "Well?" Tasuku flatly asks, repeating Kazunari's words from before. "Aren't you gonna get undressed?"

Kazunari scrambles to comply, going so far as to dramatically lie across the hotel bed. When Tasuku joins him, he's notably rougher than before, kissing down Kazunari's skin with little regard. But his hands are still gentle, his grip firm but not greedy, and something distinctly ugly stirs in Kazunari's gut. The feeling only grows when Tasuku finally starts to finger him, the same careful firmness to his movements. "C'mon," Kazunari mutters, ignoring the growing feeling in his gut as he grinds his hips downward. "Keep going, I can take it."

Kazunari gasps as Tasuku curls his fingers inside him, keeping a steady pace despite Kazunari's complaints. He continues to squirm and whine, but Tasuku only kisses him in response, and gently pulls at his cock when he tries to kick him. When Tasuku does finally pull on a condom and push into him, Kazunari feels like an absolute mess, doing his best to focus on how full he feels with Tasuku inside him instead of the rawness rising in his throat.

"You good?" Tasuku asks, and the ugly pit in his stomach begins to protest.

"Yeah," Kazunari answers breathily, because he _is._ Tasuku's cock is fulfilling in a way just fingers never could be, and Kazunari wishes he would just _move,_ already, and take what he wants just like anyone else would have. "You can move, you know. I'm not sure what you're waiting for."

Tasuku's eyes narrow, but before he can say anything, Kazunari pulls him down over his body, burying his face into his shoulder. _"Move,"_ Kazunari repeats, then wraps his legs around Tasuku's waist before bucking his hips downward. Tasuku lets out a grunt, pulling his own hips back to thrust into him.

Kazunari pants into Tasuku's shoulder, letting himself get lost in the feeling of Tasuku inside him, breath hitching whenever the angle is just right. But as the heat inside of him grows, so does the heavy feeling in his throat, expanding with every kiss pressed into his hair, with every questioning hum from Tasuku's throat and every gentle squeeze against Kazunari's leg.

 _Too much,_ Kazunari thinks, pulling his legs tighter around Tasuku's waist. He clutches harder at Tasuku's shoulders. His throat hurts. _Stop thinking so hard about me._

Tasuku slides a gentle hand from his thigh to his hipbone, and Kazunari chokes out a sob.

Tasuku immediately stills, and Kazunari finds himself clinging desperately. _No,_ he thinks, digging his fingers and heels into sweat-slicked skin. _Keep going. Don't pull away._

"Miyoshi?" Tasuku mumbles, lifting his upper body out of Kazunari's grasp. He idly wipes away the tears rapidly falling down Kazunari's face, Kazunari's hands still clinging weakly to his shoulders.

"I'm fine," Kazunari insists, trying to pull Tasuku against him once more. "Just – keep going. Please."

Tasuku doesn't budge, his torso staying stubbornly upright while Kazunari scrabbles uselessly at his shoulders. He hiccups. "Takusu, please," Kazunari tries again, more tears streaming from his eyes. His face starts to feel sticky and gross, and his stomach continues to painfully twist, but as Tasuku hesitantly starts moving again, he lets the warmth building in his groin overtake him, and ignores the eyes staring down at him as more tears continue to fall from his own.

"Takusu," he murmurs, then clenches his eyes shut. Tasuku speeds up, and Kazunari rolls his hips into the movement as best he can. Kazunari's stamina has never been the greatest, though, and he soon just lets himself be fucked, Tasuku turning him into nothing more than a limp, moaning mess. The pressure inside him builds, and like the waves that crash outside of their temporary window, Kazunari's orgasm peaks and breaks, then continues to wash over him like bubbles on the shore.

Kazunari only vaguely registers Tasuku grunting as he orgasms, hands careful but firm on Kazunari's hips. As the pleasure from Kazunari's own orgasm starts to subside, the ugly feeling in his stomach remains, twisting like a vine.

Kazunari whimpers when Tasuku finally pulls out, his chest feeling empty and hollow. More tears spill from his eyes as Tasuku kisses him, his lips caressing him like he's something precious.

There's the sound of crinkling latex, followed by the light tap of footsteps and the tinny _plop_ of the condom at the bottom of the hotel wastebasket. More footsteps, then a hand brushes Kazunari's hair away from his forehead, while a calloused thumb wipes away the last of his tears. The cloth that later brushes his stomach is damp but warm, and if Kazunari weren't so exhausted, he might've sobbed.

As it is, though, his limbs are nothing but heavy weights to him, offering no resistance as Tasuku tucks him under the covers, the bedsheets cool against his still-sweaty skin. Tasuku awkwardly pats the top of his head before walking away again, and Kazunari does his best to fall asleep.

He doesn't, so he simply listens to the sounds of the hotel shower, to the slow and steady buzz of a duffle bag zipper. To the padding of footfalls and the crumple of lifting covers, to the light creak of weight dipping onto a mattress.

And then before Tasuku can truly settle, and before Kazunari can overthink the details, Kazunari slides closer to him, forehead pressing into the firm warmth of Tasuku's shoulder. He gently hugs Tasuku's arm to his chest, and lets a single ankle tangle with Tasuku's own. Tasuku doesn't react beyond a single moment of stiffness, letting Kazunari once more cling as he pleases.

Kazunari hugs Tasuku's arm the slightest bit tighter. _This is fine,_ he thinks. _I don't need any more than this._

_I barely even deserve to have this._

Kazunari wakes up to the click of a lamp.

His body feels overly warm, and his cheeks feel taut and sticky, the bottoms of his eyes raw to the touch. His legs are lightly sore, like he overstretched at the end of practice, and his hair and skin feel too greasy to truly be comfortable. Frankly, he feels gross.

When he finally does blink his eyes open, the first thing he sees is Tasuku, phone held above his face. Kazunari's still pressed against his other arm, his own arms wrapped loosely around Tasuku's bicep. He pulls away, grimacing at the spot of drool he left on Tasuku's pajama shirt, then unceremoniously rolls out of bed, careful not to take the covers with him. He nearly falls over as soon as he's on his feet.

Kazunari reaches out a hand to steady himself against the bed. He uses his other hand to rub his eyes. "Mind if I shower?" he blearily asks, too tired to react to the roughness of his own voice.

Tasuku briefly glances at him, and Kazunari blushes as he belatedly remembers his state of undress. "Go ahead," Tasuku answers, eyes back on his phone. "I can wash up after you."

Kazunari smiles gratefully, then goes to grab his toiletries and set of clothes as quickly as his sleepy body will allow. After dropping his toiletries onto the tiny vanity and his clothes onto the toilet lid, he pushes the door shut and turns the lock with a _click._ He slumps over the sink before peaking at his reflection, puffy eyes and shiny skin staring back at him. He looks away quickly, then busies himself figuring out the intricacies of the shower head.

He carefully steps under the lukewarm stream, simply letting the water wash over him before starting to scrub the sweat away. With minty teeth and fresh clothes, he puts on a big smile in the mirror, and mostly feels like himself again. He throws a towel over his shoulders before exiting the bathroom, then throws on another smile when he sees Tasuku on the now-made bed.

Tasuku nods as he slips past him, and Kazunari laughs as he doubles back to grab a set of clothes from his bag. He plugs in his phone while Tasuku is in the bathroom. He sends off a couple texts and touches up some of the photos from yesterday – he'll post them later, when more people on online – then quickly scrolls through the posts he had missed yesterday.

Tasuku walks out of the bathroom just as Kazunari puts his phone down. "Looks like it's supposed to rain," he says, checking his own phone. He throws open the window as if to check, letting in the sound of the churning ocean. "Yeah, definitely rain."

"Do you want to stay in, then?" Kazunari asks, walking closer to look out the window himself. Despite the dark clouds painting the sky, there are people still out and about. A light drizzle starts to blow inside. "Or we can go somewhere indoors, I guess? There has to be places beside the beach around here, right?"

Tasuku shrugs, then pulls the window shut once more. "I brought a few play recordings if you want to stay in and watch those."

Kazunari can't help but snort in response. "Only you, Takusu," he comments. "Only you." Idly, he rocks onto his toes, considering the option. "Sounds good, though! But should we eat something first? I only brought snacks and cup noodles…"

Without seemingly thinking about it, Tasuku pulls up the towel from around Kazunari's neck. "Cup noodles are fine for one day," he answers, rubbing the towel on Kazunari's hair. "… Just don't tell anyone I said that." Tasuku puts the towel back around Kazunari's shoulders. He lips quirk upward. "Your hair's all puffy now. Is that why you didn't dry it?"

Kazunari's face quickly heats up. "I, um," he stutters. "I'll go find the kettle."

The hotel-provided kettle doesn't really need finding, out in the open as it is, but Tasuku doesn't question him as he clumsily grabs it. Tasuku scrutinizes his play selection while Kazunari fills the kettle in the bathroom sink. _My hair is puffy,_ Kazunari thinks, when he peeks at his reflection in the mirror, and ignores the red hue tinging his cheeks.

Tasuku sets up the DVD player while the water boils. Kazunari absentminded admires the relaxed strength in his shoulders, and waits for the kettle to beep.

"Hey," Tasuku says, some time later, as Kazunari picks up the hot kettle. His eyes don't leave the DVD player. "… Didn't think you'd be the type to cry during sex."

Kazunari's hand pauses in the air. After a moment, he finishes raising the kettle over the first cup and starts to pour. He forces out a laugh. "I guess it's just been a while," he replies, then moves onto the next cup.

Tasuku starts to open his mouth again, but Kazunari shoves a cup of noodles in his hands before he can speak. "Noodles are ready!" he cheers.

Tasuku blinks up at him, and then down at his cup noodles. "Do we have anything to eat them with?"

They do, in fact, have disposable chopsticks hidden at the bottom of one of their bags, although the noodles are lukewarm by the time they find them. Kazunari takes the time to swirl his around after every few bites, even though there isn't much to actually mix in. He does his best to pay attention to the play on the screen – it's easy, when the set is both pragmatic and beautifully done, which is something Kazunari can't help but appreciate – but in doing so, he barely notices the way Tasuku sets aside his empty cup noodle container to throw an arm over Kazunari's shoulders, casually pulling him snug against his side. Kazunari briefly tenses in surprise, but after a few seconds, he leans his head more comfortably onto Tasuku's shoulder, his own cup noodles still in hand. The two of them end up commentating over the voices on the screen, even pausing it at moments to debate more thoroughly. Throughout it all, Kazunari stays flush against Tasuku's side.

Despite the easy atmosphere, Kazunari can't help but wait for some sort of catch. But Tasuku's hand never moves beyond Kazunari's bicep, and the hand Kazunari experimentally places on Tasuku's thigh is seemingly ignored. The only real movement Tasuku makes is his hand lifting to brush through Kazunari's hair, gently ruffling the strands before returning to its spot above Kazunari's elbow. Even after they get up to stretch, and Tasuku pops another disk into the DVD player, the moment Kazunari has come to expect never comes. As they munch their way through off-brand trail mix from Kazunari's bag, Kazunari gradually loses track of the current play, his head slowly sliding from Tasuku's shoulder to rest on his chest. Tasuku doesn't stop him, even as Kazunari's eyes start to fall closed.

"It stopped raining," Tasuku suddenly announces, and Kazunari opens his eyes to Tasuku's warm chest and a blank television screen.

Kazunari sits all the way up, then stretches his stiff neck. "You could've woken me up," he murmurs, then lets out a yawn. "How long has it been since the play ended?"

"It's pretty late," Tasuku says, without really answering the question. He rolls out of the bed to stretch himself. "You got anymore cup noodles?"

Kazunari nods, and briefly wonders if he's still dreaming. "Well, yeah, but they're pretty much all we've eaten today."

Tasuku simply pulls out two servings. "It's late," he justifies. "Believe it or not, there were days I ate just these back in university."

"You're being awfully talkative," Kazunari comments. He yawns again. "I guess I'm lucky, then, since there are so many people who can cook for me now. I feel so spoiled."

"That's true," Tasuku says, peeking into the kettle to see how much water is left. His eyes narrow before he simply turns the kettle on again, letting the leftover water boil.

Kazunari nearly falls asleep again by the time Tasuku hands him a cup. He eats the noodles mechanically, falling back into Tasuku's side as soon as Tasuku sits down again.

"How late is it?" Kazunari mutters around his chopsticks.

Tasuku shrugs. "The moon is out." He gazes down at Kazunari. "We can go walk the beach, if you want."

Kazunari swallows his last mouthful of cup noodles, then turns his eyes toward the window. He's sure that under the moonlight, the tips of the waves would sparkle like tiny ocean stars. Perhaps there would be a tide pool that reflects the night sky and ripples serenely under their feet. The water would lap up the shore in cold-colored rainbows, and Kazunari's heart would beat to the rhythm of the crashing blue-green. The beach would be endless, and it would be theirs.

But the beach isn't what they came for, not really. It was easy for Kazunari to forget, next to the guise of warm sand and glimmering ocean. Even now, with his body curled comfortably atop Tasuku's chest, it's easy to pretend this is all he's here for.

Kazunari had never asked for _romantic,_ though. Tasuku had just given him it without a second thought.

With an odd sense of determination, Kazunari turns around in Tasuku's arms, then presses his against him as he places his empty cup inside the other one next to Tasuku's hip. He smirks. "Wouldn't you rather do something like this instead?"

Something like surprise lights up in Tasuku's eyes, and Kazunari wonders what he could possibly be surprised about. The real surprise was earlier, when Tasuku had simply held him and critiqued the plays on the screen and had made no move at all. The surprise was when Tasuku had let him sleep in his arms, not willing to disturb him even to replace the DVD in the player. Those things were surprising.

This? This was expected.

Staying in for this… is expected.

Tasuku sighs. "Don't force yourself, Miyoshi," he responds, and something in Kazunari starts to burn.

Kazunari immediately swings fully into Tasuku's lap, his knees bracketing Tasuku's thighs as he knocks their empty ramen cups onto the floor. "If you don't actually want to, that's fine. Just tell me plainly." He licks his lips as he leans closer, his voice dipping low. "But don't say you're stopping for me. I'm telling you I want this."

Tasuku's expression doesn't change, but Kazunari knows what he must look like, wide eyes and shiny lips reflecting the moonlight from the window, knows how smooth his skin must feel under the pads of Tasuku's fingers, landing tentatively on the small of Kazunari's back. Kazunari lifts a hand to Tasuku's cheek. "Please?"

Kazunari isn't sure who starts kissing who, but suddenly Kazunari is rocking forward, his weight landing on Tasuku's chest as Tasuku pulls him closer. Tasuku kisses him deeply but languidly, his tongue slipping easily past the part of Kazunari's lips. Kazunari jumps as Tasuku slides him even closer, pressing their hips together. Tasuku simply holds him there, seemingly content with just the warmth of Kazunari's body against his, and Kazunari trembles in attempt to stay still.

When he finally pulls away for air, Kazunari's lips are slick with spit. He swallows. "Can I suck you off?" he asks, voice breathier than he was expecting.

Tasuku exhales against his lips. Kazunari can feel his cock underneath him, the hard line of it making Kazunari's mouth water. "If that's what you want," Tasuku answers, and Kazunari ignores the way his heart constricts at the phrase, painful and indignant all at once.

Kazunari hums, soaking up the warmth of Tasuku against him for a few more moments before swinging out of Tasuku's lap.

They arrange themselves quickly, Kazunari rolling off the bed and dropping to his knees in a practiced dance. Tasuku is slightly more awkward, movements clunky as he inches himself toward the edge of the bed, and Kazunari kind of hates that he finds it endearing.

He takes a moment just to appreciate the sight of Tasuku above him, tanned collarbones peaking out from top of his shirt, then unceremoniously parts Tasuku's knees before scooting between them.

He leans his head on Tasuku's thigh as he undoes Tasuku's shorts, tugging down fabric until his cock springs free, flushed and hard. He licks away a dot of precum before making eye contact, then swirls his tongue around the tip. He blinks slowly up at Tasuku as he takes just the head in his mouth, sucking gently. Tasuku's lips part around a harsh exhale, his eyes growing darker.

Kazunari briefly pulls off to wet his lips, then quickly wraps his mouth around Tasuku once more, sliding his mouth farther down Tasuku's cock. He slides his lips up and back down, sucking lightly as he pulls up toward the head, and gradually swallowing more of him with each slide down. He pulls off completely to swirl his tongue around the head again, and curiously eyes Tasuku's hands gripping the sheets.

He swipes his tongue firmly against another bead of precum as he pries one of Tasuku's hands from the bed, then places it in his own hair. Tasuku's fingers stay stubbornly still against the back of his head, so Kazunari wraps his lips back around Tasuku and slides down as far as he can. Dragging his tongue along the underside of his cock, he pulls up with a loud suck. Then he does it again, and again, until Tasuku is groaning above him with his fingers curled tightly through his hair.

Tasuku starts to loosen his grip as soon as he realizes he's tugging, but Kazunari quickly places a hand on top of his, humming around his cock in protest. Tasuku tentatively tightens his grip once more, and Kazunari's toes curl as he moans.

He pulls away to lick from root to tip, his eyes locked on Tasuku's. Slowly, he pulls Tasuku's other hand away from the sheets, placing it next to the one already in his hair. Without looking away, he opens his mouth wide, tongue lolling out invitingly.

"Miyoshi…" Tasuku mumbles, his exhales loud and a little wet. He hips stay frustratingly still.

"Takusu," Kazunari whines, then closes his mouth into a pout. "It's not like I'm breakable," he murmurs, dragging kisses up Tasuku's length. "C'mon, I can take it."

Tasuku's face scrunches as Kazunari's kisses turn to licks, growing more insistent by the second. After a few moments, he groans again, then moves his hands to grip the sides of Kazunari's face. _Yes,_ Kazunari thinks, as Tasuku pushes his way into his mouth. _Yes._

Kazunari pointedly moans around Tasuku's cock, his eyes falling closed as Tasuku carefully thrusts into him. He lets himself melt into the feeling of Tasuku in his mouth, firm and weighty and overwhelming. Even so, there's something delicate about the way Tasuku holds him, the way he slowly fucks himself between Kazunari's lips. His thrusts are steady and controlled, gradually guiding himself deeper into Kazunari's mouth. Kazunari breathes harshly through his nose, his hands clenching around Tasuku's wrists as Tasuku hits the back of his throat.

More than anything, though, Kazunari can't help but notice the warmth of Tasuku's hands on his cheeks, and how the meat of his palms perfectly cradles the sides of his chin. Despite being on his knees with his mouth too full to even speak, Kazunari feels his heart fluttering warmly at the feeling. He feels _safe_ in Tasuku's hands, in a way he told himself sex was never supposed to feel, and Kazunari suddenly wants to cry again.

But then Tasuku is gently tilting Kazunari's face upward to push in deeper, and Kazunari's head starts to spin.

 _Fuck,_ Kazunari thinks. _Fuck._

"Miyoshi," Tasuku warns, and attempts to push him off, but Kazunari just tightens his grip around Tasuku's wrists, then slides down Tasuku's cock until he has the full length of it in his mouth, his nose pressing into coarse hair and warm skin.

With his gaze lifted upward, Kazunari sucks as best as he can, and then Tasuku is coming, and Kazunari is determined to swallow it all.

Kazunari's chest heaves when Tasuku finally manages to push him off, the inside of his mouth still lined with a mixture of spit and cum. Kazunari registers a dull thud as Tasuku suddenly drops to his knees, his hands still holding Kazunari's cheeks like he's something precious. Tasuku leans his face closer to Kazunari's, and Kazunari can feel his eyes tearing up as he gasps for air. "Can I?" Tasuku breathes against his lips, and Kazunari can't do much more than nod weakly as he squeezes Tasuku's wrists, still gripped in his hands.

Tasuku kisses him deeply once more, and it somehow steals his breath away even more than his cock did. One of Tasuku's hands leaves his cheek and moves low, undoing Kazunari's shorts with more force than finesse. Kazunari whines into the kiss as Tasuku takes him into his hand, pumping him firmly. It doesn't take long for Kazunari to come, after that, spilling over Tasuku's fingers with a desperate whimper. Tasuku strokes and kisses him through it, seemingly unbothered by both the film of cum in Kazunari's mouth and the quickly-growing mess in his hand.

Kazunari trembles and gasps when Tasuku pulls away, then involuntarily whines when Tasuku's other hand leaves his cheek. Tasuku simply brushes his fingers against his skin in response before walking away on unsteady legs, leaving Kazunari to lean his sweaty forehead against the edge of the mattress while he shakes. He distantly hears the tap turn on, followed by careful footsteps and a hand on his shoulder. Tasuku hands him a glass of water, and Kazunari gulps it down faster than he means to, but Tasuku only chuckles at him before refilling the glass.

Tasuku stays beside him as Kazunari drinks at a more reasonable pace. Indulgently, he leans against Tasuku's chest, soaking up his body heat like sand on a sunny beach. He must start to drift off, at some point, because he is abruptly awakened by the cup nearly slipping out of his hands, Tasuku just barely curling his own hands around Kazunari's limp fingers.

Heat rises to Kazunari's cheeks. He reluctantly shifts away on knees that are starting turn stiff, then abjectly fails to support his own weight as he tries to stand. Tasuku grips his upper arm to pull him up, and Kazunari continues to lean on him until his legs begin functioning again.

Tasuku doesn't really let go of him, after that, other than to change. Kazunari giggles when he spots their empty ramen cups on the floor, and throws them out properly before digging out the pajamas he had neglected the night before. The two of them end up brushing their teeth side-by-side, and Kazunari can't help but choke out another giggle as they bump shoulders trying to spit into the tiny sink. He crawls into bed warm and maybe a little delirious, feeling both pampered and close to breaking.

"Miyoshi," Tasuku says, as Kazunari reaches the cusp of sleep. "Just because you aren't breakable… that doesn't mean anyone should be trying to break you."

Kazunari freezes in Tasuku's arms. Tasuku doesn't say anything more, even as Kazunari gently rolls out of his hold to curl up on the other side of the bed. The sheets behind him rustle, but Tasuku leaves him be, and that same ugly feeling bubbles in his throat.

Kazunari exhales shakily. He doesn't fall asleep for a long time.

When Kazunari wakes up the next morning, he finds himself back in Tasuku's arms.

He's surprised that Tasuku is still asleep, but as Kazunari lifts his chin out and over the covers, he catches sight of the orange sky, the edges just barely dyed from the rising sun.

He relaxes his head back onto the pillow. Tasuku's breath brushes his forehead, warm and even with sleep. His parted lips look soft, even with the chapped skin surrounding them, and his eyelashes cast unfairly pretty shadows across his cheeks. Kazunari's own eyes feel crusty and tired, but his mind is already awake, his whole head buzzing like seafoam on the sand.

Carefully, he scoots his way out of Tasuku's arms, wincing whenever the covers rustle a bit too loudly. He tiptoes to the bathroom before he haphazardly splashes water onto his face, then picks out the crust from his eyes. After a moment's pause, he sticks his head under the faucet to rinse out his mouth.

When Kazunari exits the bathroom, Tasuku has already propped himself up on one elbow, rubbing his eyes with his free hand. Kazunari, not sure what else to do, slips back under the covers, leaning his back against the headboard. "I didn't mean to wake you," he whispers, his eyes on his knees.

"It's fine," Tasuku assures. He yawns.

Kazunari involuntarily smiles at the sight, then reaches over to grab his phone. _Dead,_ he thinks, as he presses the power button. He sighs, prepared to slip out of the covers once more, when Tasuku grabs his phone out of his hand.

"Mine's dead too," he explains. "I'll just plug them both in."

Kazunari lets him, linking his fingers together in his lap. He pulls on his index finger as Tasuku joins him once more on the bed, then on his middle finger when Tasuku lays down. Kazunari strains his ears past the silence of the room, listening to the waves wash up on the shore.

"Miyoshi," Tasuku eventually says, rolling over to face him. He grips the pillow under his head. "Is this okay?"

Kazunari giggles, grappling for his usual cheer. "What do you mean, Takusu? I'm the one who invited you, aren't I?"

Tasuku narrows his eyes, then reaches out a hand to lie atop of Kazunari's clenched ones. Kazunari doesn't remember tensing them. "But is it, is this – are you _okay?"_

Kazunari's lips curl upward. "I still don't know what you mean, Takusu." He giggles again. "You're being surprisingly clumsy with your words."

Tasuku jaw clenches, his eyes trained on Kazunari's hip. After a few moments, his whole face relaxes, eyes slipping shut as he exhales. He opens his eyes. "Am I hurting you?" he asks, plain and simple. He squeezes Kazunari's hands. "Doing all this with you – is it hurting you?"

Kazunari's lips part in surprise. _Of course not,_ he wants to say, but Tasuku's gaze stops him from immediately answering. He recalls the ugly clench in his gut, whenever Tasuku had been soft with him, and the way his throat had burned at Tasuku's shows of consideration. _But that was just because it was weird, wasn't it? He wasn't supposed to take care of me._ _That isn't how it's supposed to work._

Kazunari licks his suddenly dry lips. He swallows. Tasuku's hand continues to hold his. "I'm not… used to being taken care of, I guess." _Just… taken._ He licks his lips again. "People just tend to be demanding with me. It's fine, though!" he assures. "I was always, um – into it, so it's fine."

Tasuku sits up, then shuffles backwards until his hip meets Kazunari's. "…Let me?"

Kazunari blinks at him. "Let you what?"

Tasuku other hand grabs his. "Let me take care of you?"

For a moment, Kazunari lets himself consider it: he thinks about lazy kisses and gentle hands, about the delicate caution that left him whimpering. He thinks about the blue-green sea, and the way Tasuku had let Kazunari drag him along it, his wrist slack and warm in Kazunari's grip. He thinks about the earnest delivery of Tasuku's words, blunt and awkward and with eyebrows furrowed, and so far away from the prince Kazunari knows he could be.

And maybe that's why Kazunari lets him.

He nods around an exhale, and his eyes flutter shut as Tasuku kisses him firmly. Tasuku squeezes Kazunari's hands once more before his own hands start to wander, sliding up Kazunari's side before tracing lines down his back, palms sliding forward to smooth up Kazunari's stomach. Kazunari melts right into them, his own hands scrambling upward to curl into Tasuku's shirt.

Tasuku's lips are wet and insistent, and Kazunari does his best to keep up, but he eventually has to pull away for air. Tasuku looks at him like he's something to be treasured, and Kazunari immediately looks down, unable to meet his eyes. "Take this off for me?" he mumbles, tugging lightly on Tasuku's shirt.

Tasuku hums, his hands sliding from Kazunari's stomach back to his sides. "Can we take them all off?"

Kazunari shuts his eyes once more, then takes a moment just to breathe. Kazunari doesn't want to choose – he wants Tasuku to lead him, to lay Kazunari bare as he pleases – but Tasuku has already made his intentions clear. _Let me take care of you._

 _I want you to,_ Kazunari thinks. _I want you to._

_I don't know how to let you._

"Yeah," Kazunari answers, already pulling away to stand and strip himself of his shirt. Tasuku doesn't move from his spot on the bed. "Well?" Kazunari teases, folding his shirt before tossing it to the foot of the bed. "You have to do it, too."

Tasuku blinks at him a couple times before complying, sitting on the edge of the bed once he's fully undressed. Kazunari walks around the bed to meet him, feeling oddly bashful as Tasuku's hands land on his waist. Kazunari giggles from where he stands in front of Tasuku. Even after being fucked into the sheets, it's _this_ that makes him shy – the barely-there touch of Tasuku's fingers on his skin, Tasuku's eyes looking up at him like Kazunari's something worth waiting for.

Kazunari gently cups the back of Tasuku's neck, then leans down to meet his lips once more. There's still the sting of ugliness, sitting at the bottom of his spine, but it's nothing compared to the warmth radiating from Tasuku's lips and hands, and Kazunari wants nothing more than to be closer.

Carefully, Kazunari places one knee up on the bed besides Tasuku's hip, and then the other, and then Tasuku quickly slides him closer, his cock pressed against Tasuku's stomach and his legs bracketing Tasuku's own. One of Tasuku's hands starts to wander again, tracing up the knobs of Kazunari's spine. He gently scrapes his nails against Kazunari's skin on the way down, and Kazunari shivers at the touch, his back arching as Tasuku repeats the movement. Tasuku slowly grows harder under him, the tip of his cock pressed against the bottom of Kazunari's thigh.

Tasuku's other hand leaves his waist to grab for the lube and condoms they never actually put away after the first night, his lips never leaving Kazunari's. Both his hands leave Kazunari completely to open the bottle behind Kazunari's back, some of it dripping onto his skin from Tasuku's fingers.

And then Tasuku is grabbing the bottom of Kazunari's thigh with his clean hand, their lips separating as Tasuku lifts him upward, and Kazunari gasps as his cock twitches at the treatment. His gasp roughly turns a moan as Tasuku traces over his skin with a wet finger, before finally brushing against his entrance.

"This good?" Tasuku whispers, and Kazunari buries a nod into his hair.

Kazunari whimpers as Tasuku pushes a finger into him, thrusting languidly as his mouth moves to Kazunari's collarbone. He sucks on the skin lazily, distracting Kazunari as he works another finger inside of him.

 _"Ah,"_ Kazunari lets out, as Tasuku immediately scissors his fingers apart. He tries to thrust backward to push them deeper, but Tasuku's hold tightens on his thigh, keeping him in place. He whimpers again, then wraps his arms fully around Tasuku's neck.

Kazunari is a babbling mess by the time Tasuku gets a third finger in him, whimpering nonsense as he tries to relieve the building pressure in his groin. "Takusu," he whines, shivering as Tasuku pointedly curls his fingers. "Please, I want to ride you, I'm ready, please – "

Kazunari cuts himself off with a groan as Tasuku gently removes his fingers and loosens his grip on his thigh. Tasuku cranes his neck backward to kiss him, and Kazunari does his best to lick into his mouth. He unashamedly rubs his cock against Tasuku's stomach while Tasuku prepares himself, rolling on a condom and more lube than strictly necessary.

Tasuku holds his cock still with one hand as he lifts Kazunari up with the other once more, but his hold is looser, this time, and Kazunari wastes no time taking full advantage of that fact, lowering himself down onto Tasuku's cock, his weight supported by his arms on Tasuku's shoulders. Kazunari groans when he bottoms out, and Tasuku's hands move upward to hold onto his hips.

He shifts around in Tasuku's lap, adjusting to the familiar fullness, then slowly lifts himself up before dropping back down again. He moans at the feeling, then gradually picks up the pace until his forehead is damp with sweat. He pants into Tasuku's hair as Tasuku presses kisses into his neck and shoulder, and it's not enough. Kazunari can only do so much for himself, and it's _not enough._

Right when Kazunari opens his mouth to ask for more, Tasuku tightens his grip on Kazunari's hips, then snaps his own hips upward, meeting Kazunari as he drops down. A strangled moan leaves Kazunari's mouth instead of the words he intended as Tasuku begins to control the pace. At some point, he relaxes his full weight onto Tasuku's torso, his thighs shaking as Tasuku holds him up to thrust into him.

"Close," he mumbles, as Tasuku continues to fuck him. Tasuku slides a hand under his thigh in response, supporting Kazunari as his other hand slides forward to brush against Kazunari's cock.

 _So this is what you meant,_ Kazunari thinks, as Tasuku wraps his fingers around him.

And for the third time in as many days, he wants to cry again.

Then Tasuku is stroking him, his grip warm and rough and tight, and Kazunari's entire body tenses, his vision going white as he comes.

He's not sure how much time passes before the world comes back into focus. Tasuku is pressing kisses onto his collarbone, his hands gently running up and down Kazunari's sides. Tasuku groans as Kazunari shifts in his lap, his cock still hard inside of him. With a groan of his own, Kazunari slowly starts moving his hips again, gradually picking up the pace once more.

"Miyoshi – " Tasuku chokes out, staying carefully still under him. "You don't have to – "

Kazunari kisses him sloppily before he can finish speaking, continuing to bounce on Tasuku's lap as best he can. He feels boneless and oversensitive, and the muscles in his thighs are burning with exertion, but he wants so badly for Tasuku to feel _good_ because of him. He wants to take care of him, too.

And maybe, selfishly – he wants Tasuku to himself for just a little bit longer.

Kazunari whimpers as Tasuku starts thrusting up again, and it's not long until Tasuku is coming, his arms clutching Kazunari's body close. Tasuku's groan melts into something high-pitched and needy, and if Kazunari's legs weren't already useless, he's sure they would've given out at the sound.

For many moments, they stay just like that, panting into each other's skin with Kazunari's cum drying on their stomachs. Then Tasuku slowly pulls Kazunari up and off of him, laying him down diagonally across the bed. He crawls between Kazunari's sprawled legs, rubbing Kazunari's thighs before leaning down to kiss his lips. The kiss is open-mouthed and unhurried, and Kazunari lets himself sink fully into the sheets, his eyes falling shut as his body relaxes.

"I don't think I can get up," Kazunari rasps honestly, when Tasuku ultimately pulls away.

"That's fine," Tasuku says. He pushes Kazunari's bangs out his face, then effortlessly pulls Kazunari up with him as he stands.

Tasuku unceremoniously pulls them both into the shower. Kazunari's legs feel like jelly, but Tasuku holds his weight up easily, even as he fawns over him. Kazunari lets him do so – he clings to Tasuku's shoulders as he scrubs shampoo through Kazunari's hair, and as he runs a soapy washcloth over Kazunari's skin. Kazunari giggles when Tasuku tries to wash himself one handed, but Tasuku stubbornly keeps one arm around him. He wraps Kazunari in a fluffy towel when they finally step out, and uses a smaller one to dry Kazunari's hair into the wispy spikes he seems fond of.

Even after they're dressed and their stuff is packed back in their bags, Tasuku refuses to let go of him. The ugly feeling from that first night returns, and Kazunari wonders if it ever even left.

Tasuku is good at distracting him, though. Not with words, or even with attention, but with the way he fumbles through the morning while keeping Kazunari at his side.

Despite Tasuku's silent disapproval, Kazunari carries his and Tasuku's bags to Tasuku's car as he returns their room keys. "Let's hit the beach one more time?" Kazunari asks, as soon as Tasuku walks outside.

Tasuku rolls his eyes in response. "Just get in the car, Miyoshi."

They grab breakfast at the first convenience store they pass, and Kazunari laughs at the way Tasuku's lips twist when he sees Kazunari's canned coffee. The late-morning sun is already relentlessly beating down when they reach the beach, but the ocean breeze makes it bearable. Kazunari takes a sip of his coffee, then leans his head on Tasuku's shoulder, both their eyes trained on the water. Tasuku's arm wraps around him like it's easy, and maybe, for Tasuku, it is.

"For a beach trip, we didn't actually spend that much time at the beach," Kazunari jokes.

Tasuku shrugs, jostling Kazunari's chin. "That wasn't the important part, was it?"

Out in front of him, the ocean stretches in a blue-green expanse. In a few hours, the sand under their feet will be too hot to comfortably walk on, and a few hours after that, the sun will start to fall. The sand will cool again. And the ugly clenching in Kazunari's throat and stomach will remain, however small.

It's not too bad, though, when he's standing next to Tasuku like this, the salt-breeze blowing across their faces. And maybe one day, he'll learn to feel like this on his own.

 _This is nice,_ he thinks again. _I'll treasure it._

_Let me take care of you._

Kazunari shifts in Tasuku's hold. "We should head back soon," he says, his toes curling further in the sand.

"Mm," Tasuku hums, his arm still slung around him. "Just a minute."

_Can't believe he managed to fall asleep again,_ Tasuku thinks, glancing over at Kazunari slumped in the passenger seat.

To Tasuku's right is the blue-green sea, outlined by the off-white sand. He still doesn't quite get the aesthetic appeal – maybe it's the ever-shifting colors along the shore – but he can appreciate the simplicity of the straight horizon, and the rhythmic rumble of the breaking waves from his open window. He might even call it beautiful.

And yet, his eyes are drawn back to Kazunari, his head vaguely propped up by the fabric of his seatbelt, and his empty coffee can clutched loosely in his hands.

"Guess that means he's beautiful, too," Tasuku mumbles to himself, dragging his eyes back onto the road. "… Sleep well, Miyoshi."

Kazunari's fingers twitch around his coffee can. Tasuku rolls up his window and drives on.

**Author's Note:**

> twitter: @jea9yj


End file.
